La Vie en Rose

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The Picture above is from one of my favorite movies ever, Sabrina

Sabrina : No one ever stops... The whole place. And it's like everything is asleep... and... I used to walk everywhere in Paris. I used to walk from Montmartre down into the center of the town. Along the Seine there is a 4-mile wall that goes from Isle Saint Germain to the Pontde Bercy. Takes you past all the bridges of Paris, 23 of them. Then you find one you love and you go there everyday with your coffee and your journal, and you listen to the river... I found myself in Paris.

It seems as though every time I find myself listening to La Vie en Rose radio on my Pandora, I tend to have a lot on my mind.

Today, this is particularly true as I find myself sitting in Starbucks (the usual) listening to La Vie en Rose radio and contemplating my future. I lose myself in the haze of caffeine as it travels through my veins.

I've been sitting here for the last two hours or maybe more, just writing. Letters to myself, allowing me to put my thoughts and feelings down into words. I sat here and wrote four pages of the thoughts going through my mind, the hours go by like minutes. I look up only to see the people sitting across from me replaced by another couple drinking their cups of coffee. How, I wonder, is it that I can become so enthralled by my writing that I become oblivious to the happenings around me. It's kind of a crazy thing to think about, but I suppose that's just the way I am.

If only I could share my thoughts and feelings with you, but however much you might might like to know what's going through my mind, I would be far too naive to express my true self on here the way I do in my many, many letters.

Sometimes, when I look back through what I've written I surprise myself with the way my words form so perfectly, flawlessly without my even noticing. It surprises me so, and I find it comforting to read the words I use to express myself, almost as though I am an outsider looking in. For that short moment, able to take a breath and gain insight into the depths of my mind.

This sure is some heavy stuff for a Sunday afternoon. But no matter, what can you be other than yourself? Writing is an awfully wonderful thing, in every type of way, writing is my stress reliever and words are my muse, never ceasing to amaze me with the way they can express the way I truly feel.

The picture I included above is from one of my favorite movies of all time, Sabrina. I also included a quote from my favorite scene in the movie, I feel like it goes right along with me and the way that I am. To "find yourself in Paris," how wonderful would it be to do just that?

I suppose that's all for now, my hands are starting to hurt after all this typing.. (:

Love,

Madison

p.s. remember not to change for anyone but yourself.

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Fashion.

"Never, ever confuse what happens on a runway with fashion...A runway is spectacle. It's only fashion when a woman puts it on. Being well dressed hasn't much to do with having good clothes. It's a question of good balance and good common sense." - Oscar de la Renta Last night was the Met...

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What if

That simple feeling of disappointment. You wonder, “when will this feeling go away” or “how do I just let go?” Everyone tells you to “just move on” or “forget about it.” It’s not as easy as it sounds. Why do we allow ourselves to be disappointed? How exactly does one become disappointed?...

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Monday Blues

It's been a while, friends. Sometimes I get so busy and caught up in the swing of things that I forget to write. It has been exactly two months since my last post "Baby it's (still) cold outside" and I am happy to report that it is finally warm again.

Today is a Monday and I can't help but think that maybe I've caught a case of the Monday Blues. Here I am with two weeks left of high school and only fifteen days until the beginning of the rest of my life. Somehow I've found myself getting quite sentimental lately. Surely that's only normal with such a huge transition happening in my life. How strange to think that in two weeks I will never see some of the people I've seen everyday for the last three years. But then again, this isn't the first time I've made such a transition. I have moved and completely started over nine times and counting, and that really isn't so different than graduating from high school.

This year has been so great, so full of emotional changes and new experiences. I have become so independent and I couldn't be prouder of myself. Sometimes time is what it takes to heal your heart and allow your mind to grow and explore. My senior year of high school is one that I will never forget. It's strange this new feeling of confidence that I have, this urge to explore and meet new people. I feel like an adult, it kind of just hit me and one day I looked up and realized that I finally have a clear mind and an open heart.

Another thing I wanted to share is a feeling of gratitude. Many people who know me know that I have moved many times and attended many different schools. It's hard as you grow older to transition so many times the way that I have, however, I am so thankful that I have had the opportunity to live in so many places and meet so many people. I would like to think that I have more best friends in more states and countries than any one that I know, and that is just something that makes me unique. When I was younger I would get so angry with my parents for moving me all around so often. I never felt rooted in one spot, because just when I got comfortable they moved us again. My dad's job was the cause for this and we supported him because it was the best move for our family as a whole. Many times I can remember being jealous of my friends who had known each other their whole lives, falling in love with the boy next door, or the boy you've been best friends with since you were little was my fairytale dream. But here I am, about to leave all the people I have spent the last three years of high school with and I am able to watch my friends from all over as they experience the same transition that I am experiencing. It's a funny thing the way life works out, but it always seems to do just that. It always works out. The future may seem uncertain and even a little scary, but I know from experience that when you look back on those rough moments in your life, you smile a little because you see how much you grew from that experience and how it led you to something so much greater.

I could not be more thankful for the people I have met throughout my life and how each and every one of them has shaped me in some way.

Now, hopefully I can be done with all of this sappy stuff, because all I really want to do is go out and meet more people and share their stories. I have had this unique opportunity to share my own story, and I believe that everyone no matter who they are has a story to be shared.

I suppose that's all for now. Hopefully I won't stay away for too long this time. It sure has been nice catching up with you, my friends.

Love,

Madison

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